Book Review: Galaxy Jane by Ron Goulart
Galaxy Jane: adventurer, space pirate, freedom fighter, and one of the most interesting persons the Barnum System ever knew. A book about her would probably be awesome. But this isn’t that book. Instead it’s about NewzNet reporter Jack Summer, who’s ostensibly been assigned to write a story about the new movie based on Galaxy Jane’s greatest adventure. But we all know he’s really a scandal-sniffer, and his real job is to investigate information that the starship Hollywood II is secretly involved in Zombium smuggling.
Jack isn’t thrilled about this assignment, especially as he’ll have to work with recent journalism school graduate (and boss’ daughter) Vicky Nugent. But he’s behind on his alimony, and the money’s too good to pass up. Vicky comes with camera operator/bodyguard Scoop, a combat robot who’s been reconditioned with snappy patter and a variety of useful tools.
The trio board the Hollywood II and encounter various wacky show business types, from irascible parrotman writer Harlan Gyrzb (a transparent stand-in for irascible human writer Harlan Ellison), through “moderately swishy” catman actor Ezra Zilber, to consultant Bunker King, Jr., great-grandson of the character played by the male lead, who strongly objects to the way his ancestor is being portrayed.
After some hijinks on the city-ship, our characters land on Murdstone, the planet that will be used for location shoots for the Galaxy Jane movie. Temporarily separated from Vicky and Scoop, Jack runs into lecherous former partner and photographer Palma, and recruits local guide and telekinetic mutant Finity Kwark to assist them. Too bad they get captured too!
Just when it looks like the case is wrapped up, the locals get riled up, and it looks like the big battle scene meant for the movie will play out in real life. How’s Jack going to get out of this one?
As you might have guessed, this is a science fiction spoof. Zany personalities, comical situations, unlikely events. Ron Goulart wrote quite a few novels and stories along these general lines. No attempt is made to make the mix of humans, variant humans, animal-people, weirder aliens, robots and androids seem particularly plausible, and Mr. Goulart feels free to toss in random background gags with no larger purpose. Why is there a “dirty wrestlers” convention at this remote inn in a swamp? Why not?
In a lot of ways, this book feels like it could have been written in the 1960s rather than the 1980s, with perhaps the female characters being allowed to be more effective than back in the day without it being treated as a big deal. Jack is less worried about working with Vicky because she’s a woman, and more that she’s a rookie. A rookie who’s a crack shot, as she keeps reminding him (and finally gets to prove.)
That said, there’s a definite undercurrent of horniness. Palma may be the one who actively pursues any woman with noticeable breasts, but Jack has a reputation for canoodling himself, and it’s not ever completely denied or confirmed in his thoughts. Several of the women in the story are clearly open to warm embracing and maybe more.
My personal favorite is Finity, who has an “aw-shucks” attitude towards her telekinetic powers, and a folksy way of speaking. “Well, for blamsakes!”
Most of the gags land, and if you don’t like one, another will be along in a paragraph.
Content note: Fantastic racism played for laughs (one fellow explains that normally he’d never be defending reptile people, who are the lowest of the low, but these particular ones share a hobby with him.) Drug abuse. Slavery (Palma and Finity free the slaves they stumble across, but there’s not much they can do about the social structure.) Offscreen extramarital sex. Goverment agencies regularly bug people’s rooms without a warrant. A bit of homophobia. Ageism, again played for laughs as Jack is 39, and is constantly reminded that’s over the hill for reporters.
Overall: A lot of the reviews I’ve seen did not appreciate the bait and switch of the title and cover. If you can overlook that, this is a funny but inconsequential romp that you can probably find cheap used.
