Book Review: If This Goes On edited by Charles Nuetzel
The “if this goes on” story is a staple of short science fiction. Pick a current trend like “women not wearing hats anymore” or “cat videos” and extend it out to an exaggerated conclusion. For example, the Robert Heinlein story of that name, which posits a resurgence of fundamentalist Christianity thanks to mass communications and a few other factors. The stories in this volume don’t all match that pattern, but that’s the general idea.
After an introduction by Forrest J. Ackerman and a preface by the editor, there are twelve stories and one non-fiction article. One weird thing. Despite Ray Bradbury’s “Almost the End of the World” being in the introductions and the copyright section and referred to in the front and back cover materials–it isn’t in the book! The first time through I thought my copy might be missing pages, but no, it’s just not there. I wonder if there’s a story someone knows about what happened?
“The Test” by Richard Matheson leads off the volume. In the far future world of 2003, population pressure has caused the government to decide to reduce the surplus population by testing to see if old people have become more of a burden than a benefit. If the senior fails the test, they are euthanized. Les Parker is trying to get his father Tom ready for the test. But much as he loves his old man, Les knows that Tom has had a serious physical and mental decline in recent years, and he has indeed become a burden. Tom knows it too, and bitterly refuses to admit it.
It’s a chilling story, and euthanasia remains a touchy subject.
“The Earth Killers” by A.E. van Vogt is a Sixties remix of his original 1949 short story, which I’ve reviewed before. Atomic bombs are dropped on America; only one surviving eyewitness knows where they came from, but is disbelieved so thoroughly that he’s sentenced to life at hard labor. Eventually he escapes and reveals the truth. This version is much more openly anti-racist.
“The Racer” by Ib Melchior was the inspiration for the Roger Corman movie Death Race 2000; cross-country motor racing has become a blood sport in which drivers not only attempt to finish in the fastest time, but rack up the most pedestrian casualties. Driver Willie makes the mistake of stopping to look at his handiwork.
“All the Troubles of the World” by Isaac Asimov has humanity largely having turned over government to Multivac, a city-sized computer/artificial intelligence. By having the facts and figures of every person in the world entered into its database, Multivac can determine when and where resources will be needed, and things are running a lot more smoothly than they used to. Multivac can even predict crimes!
It’s this last function that is the crux of the story, as Multivac predicts its own destruction at the hands of a particular citizen. The authorities pre-emptively arrest the man, but the probability of Multivac being destroyed only go up! It turns out there’s a more cunning mind behind the plot.
“Friends and Enemies” by Fritz Leiber takes place in a future California where World War Three wasn’t quite as bad as in some other timelines. A science teacher is expelled from a small town college for having been a nuclear physicist, which makes a bit of sense, but then why is his nemesis, an literature teacher, also being exiled? Turns out that fellow had written some stories exploring concepts of “free love” and giving students “ideas”, especially the dean’s daughter. That young woman follows them into the wilderness, they meet a faded Hollywood star (it’s 1993) and the men learn they have more in common than they thought. By comparison to some of the other stories in this volume, light-hearted.
“No Land of Nod” by Sherwood Springer takes place after a much worse World War Three involving germ warfare. What starts out as an “Adam and Eve” plotline becomes “Lot and his daughters.” Very controversial in its time.
“A Very Cultured Taste” by George Frederic (pen name for Charles Nuetzel) is another post-apocalyptic tale. Revis Montrey saw World War Three coming and built himself a bunker stocked with only the finest things. He’s got enough food for him and his faithful servant to last for years, but the meat needs to be supplemented every so often….
“The Mute Question” by Forrest J. Ackerman is a short in which a mutant considers a philosophical question–as a setup for a groan-worthy bit of wordplay.
“Homo Sap” by Charles Nuetzel has the human race wiped out and the world left to intelligent apes. But can they avoid the mistakes their predecessors made, or is the myth cycle too strong?
“Aquella” by Donald A. Wollheim. A vacationer arrives on a planet that seems like paradise, but the “pink” people there, with skin paler than any he’s ever seen, have an aura of sorrow about them. The ending is supposed to be shocking, but was too easy to spot coming.
“The Climbing Wave” by Marion Zimmer Bradley is a long story in which the descendants of an expedition to the stars return to Earth after centuries. The protagonist is looking forward to the super-scientific civilization he’s sure has come about while they were away. He’s sorely surprised by what they actually find, an Arcadia that seems to have discarded technology and even curiosity.
Eventually, he learns that things are not quite what they seem, but I still have serious doubts about that social system. It comes across as smug and gently sexist (in a “of course we totally respect women and their autonomy but having babies is after all their primary thing and they’re happier doing that” way.)
“Your Life in 1977” by Willy Ley is a fact-based article in which Mr. Ley speculates about future trends based on a television appearance he’d had ten years before. He heavily caveats his predictions. It took purple hair a bit longer to catch on than he thought. And while it’s true that we didn’t have private communicators by 1977, we did eventually get the smartphone.
“Preposterous” by Fredric Brown is another silly short to finish the volume. Turns out that in the future, parents will still disapprove of their children’s trashy reading material.
The strong lineup of authors and generally heavy subject matter (suicide, incest, cannibalism, euthanasia, etc.) makes this volume feel like a precursor to Dangerous Visions. This anthology has never been reprinted, so it may be difficult to track down, but the better stories have been reprinted in other anthologies so you can read them there. I particularly recommend the Matheson and Melchior stories.
